Customer: “So my grandson said I need to get a stick.”

Me: “A stick?”

Customer: “To put my photos in or something.”

Me: “A memory stick?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Is this a stick to go into your computer?”

Customer: “I don’t have a computer.”

Me: “Okay, well, we have a lot of memory sticks, but most of them should be fine if you just want to store photos on them. Did your grandson say how big it needed to be?”

Customer: “Size of a thumb.”

Me: “Thumb drive! That’s helpful, but I meant how big the memory needed to be. Did your grandson mention anything like megabytes or gigabytes?”

Customer: “Jiggle beets.”

Me: “A gigabyte, okay. This model here is affordable at only one gigabyte, and it flips between two different types of interface so that it works with almost any computer.”

I demonstrate how the thumb drive has USB-C on one side and a regular USB on the other.

Customer: “And that has all my photos?”

Me: “Well, it will once your grandson helps you to put them on there.”

Customer: “No, my grandson said I would need to come here to get a stick that has all my photos. Where is that?”

Me: “We don’t have any of your photos, ma’am. We just sell the memory sticks. You or your grandson would need to put the photos on there.”

Customer: “So you’re calling my grandson a liar?!”

Me: “I’m… suggesting you call him and ask him to clarify?”

Customer: “Hmph! Fine!”

She gets out her flip-phone and types in a number from memory. She gets through to her grandson, I assume.

Customer: “So I’m at the computer store, and they’re telling me they don’t have the stick with my photos.”

Pause.

Customer: “Oh, well, you didn’t explain that!”

Pause.

Customer: “Fine. But you made me look stupid! The guy here asked how big it needed to be.”

Pause.

Customer: “Fine, I’ll tell him.”

She hangs up and declares to me that she needs four gigabytes, except she mispronounces it again, and instead of saying gigabyte with a ‘g’, she starts it with an ‘n’.

Thank god the store was empty.

Related:

My Head Megahertz, Part 4
My Head Megahertz, Part 3
My Head Megahertz, Part 2
My Head Megahertz